Nebulous Mooch

My dad’s birthday was Saturday, so we threw him a surprise party. My dad loves parties. Sometimes he claims he doesn’t but he’s always in the middle of the crowd lapping up the attention.

About an hour before the party some people called and said they wouldn’t be able to make it. My husband and mother started to feel nervous. “What if no one shows up?” they both wondered aloud.

Don’t they know by now that everyone loves my father. Of course, people will show up. My father has a special talent. He can say the rudest, meanest thing to some one’s face and no one seems to notice. My father can completely insult someone and when he leaves, the person will turn to me and say, “I love your father. He’s great!”

Once my father threw a party. I don’t remember what it was for, but he was late. He was late for his own party and all of the guests just sat around saying, “Where’s Stan? We can’t wait ’til Stan comes. Isn’t Stan great?” When my dad finally walked through the door everyone stood up and started clapping and cheering. I wonder what it’s like to have people applaud just because you walked into the room. He hadn’t done anything! He should’ve been scolded for showing up late for a party that was his idea. Instead he received accolades.

Of course Saturday’s surprise party was a success. The clubhouse was packed with people fawning over him and calling him dad. I think some of those people calling him dad weren’t that much younger than him. It must be great to be that adored.