Nebulous Mooch

I’ve decided that the giant fibroid hanging off the back of my uterus probably has something to do with why I haven’t gotten pregnant even after a year of trying. I’m no doctor, so this is just a guess. I went to the doctor about it and already she is talking about the possibility of surgery. Surgery!! I hate surgery.

The Worst Things About Getting an Operation

• Being wheeled to the operation room
• Being put under with anesthesia
• A doctor cutting into your body
• Waking up after the operation
• Recovering

If it wasn’t for those bits I’d love operations.

With the possibility of surgery looming over my head I had to get my brain into action to figure out how to get rid of a fibroid quickly in the comfort of my own home. That’s when I found some articles about fasting. Some people claim that if you fast for an extended period of time your fibroid will shrink. So I decided to try it.

My husband was not thrilled about this whole fasting idea so I waited until he was spending a few days away on a tour to start. The goal was to go on a 10 day water fast. I had no reason for choosing 10 days. It just seemed like a good number.

“I can fast for 10 days, no problem,” I thought. The articles I read about fasting for fibroids all recommended fasting for 20 or more days, but that seemed a bit ridiculous to me.

The first 24 hours of my fast were a breeze. I do 24 hour fasts monthly, so I’m used to it. On the second day, I was so hungry that I could’ve chewed off my own arm and I had a headache. So I sat on the couch for a while thinking about my headache and wondering if I was having a brain aneurysm. Then I thought, I don’t want to die from a brain aneurysm while I’m hungry, so I ate a banana. Then I ate another banana and let’s just say that my 10 fast was a little less than successful.

Picture by 96dpi.

I like to exercise. What I should say is that I exercise because I should, not because I like to. I like to eat curry while watching crime dramas on the sofa. If that counts as exercise then I like to exercise. Unfortunately, I’m all too aware that that doesn’t count as exercise.

I do yoga most mornings. That counts as exercise and I like that, but I always feel like I should be doing something else too. When it’s nice outside I sprint, but this is England and it’s not nice outside very often. I do my apartment running on a pretty regular basis, but my running has been pretty slack. It’s more like apartment walking in place and then stopping and sitting down because its hard to read the subtitles on the Danish crime drama I’ve been watching whilst moving all around.

The other day I decided to start doing some more intense exercise. I make this decision every couple of months and usually end up exercising so hard that I ache for a week afterwards and then never repeat the workout again. This time I decided I needed some guidance for my workout so I searched for home strength training online and eventually found this site. I’ve been following their workout schedule and its hard fun.

I’m in Florida visiting family and friends now. My least favorite thing about flying is jet lag. Let me tell you, jet lag can really put something on you. When I was working in Korea I remember my jet lag being crazy whenever I flew back and forth between Korea and the States. I’d take deep dark confusing naps in the middle of the day and wake up not knowing where I was.

Now that I’m older and wiser I’ve gotten this whole jet lag thing under control. I’m going to let you in on the secret. Don’t eat during your trip. That’s it. Easy, right? Fasting isn’t that hard when you’re traveling because airplane food is a complete nightmare. Every time the flight attendants come down the aisle with the food cart I feel like I’m going to retch from the smell anyway.

Stay hydrated during the trip. Every time the flight attendants come down the aisle with that drink cart get some water. Ask for water even when you’re not offered it. Being dehydrated will make jet lag worst. If you’re traveling alone get an aisle seat. You don’t want to disturb the other passengers in your row. You’ll have to pee every a million times during the flight because you’re fasting and drinking tons of water.

On your flight keep the sleep wake schedule of your destination. If you’ll be arriving in the early morning sleep on the flight. If you’re arriving in the evening stay awake on the flight.

Once you get to your destination eat at the next meal time. When you do your brain will reset so you’ll be on the schedule of your destination. If you do get tired during the day, don’t nap any longer than 30 minutes. Spending lots of time out in the sunlight will also help. That’s easy for me do in Florida, but not so easy in the UK. That country is not exactly famous for its sunshine.

Follow this simple advice and your jet lag will be minimal next time you travel.

My husband was told by the doctor not too long ago that he has a Candida problem. He keeps getting yeasty ear infections. Candida treatment isn’t covered under the NHS. He would need to see a private medical professional to take care of the problem. So in true Bettison fashion we’ve decided to take care of this problem ourselves.

We’ve been on a torturous anti-Candida cleansing diet for a week. Basically we couldn’t eat anything. Really, that’s a gross exaggeration. We didn’t eat any starches for a week. It was all veggies and protein and I hated it. We’ve also had to cut out two of my favorite cooking ingredients, soy sauce and fish sauce. Normally, we practically live on Thai curries. I’m also a huge fried rice fan. We’ve also had to stop eating sugars which isn’t a problem because we rarely eat anything sweet. I do tend to eat piles of raisins during the day though. Apparently, that counts as sweet.

About Candida

Candida albicans is the name of a yeast that lives in your gut. Your digestive tract is full of lovely micro-organisms having a big party. They all live peacefully together, but sometimes things horribly go wrong. The friendly bacteria in your gut gets killed off by illness, medication or maybe even injury. Without anyone to keep them in check the Candida get out of control like teenagers left alone by their vactioning parents.

The Candida start having a big keg party and inviting all their yeasty friends to completely trash your body. That’s when you start noticing symptoms like diahrrea, bloating, and gas. The systems aren’t limited to the digestive tract though. You may also experience headaches, fatigue, joint and muscle pain and cloudy thinking. My thinking has been cloudy ever since I can remember, maybe I have a permanent Candida infection. The Candida party will eventually start to spill out of you causing yeast infections, thrush, jock itch and rectal itching. (Isn’t that lovely)

You know the party is getting really wild when the Candida starts to do damage to your intestinal walls causing an illness known as leaky gut syndrome. Leaky gut syndrome occurs when the walls of your intestines become permeable allowing toxins and food partials to spill into your blood stream.

Because your gut and immune system are tightly linked Candida overgrowth has also been linked to some autoimmune diseases.

If you’re looking to start a Candida diet here are some foods you need to cut out.

Sugar

Yeast loves sugar. That means cutting out all the sweet yummy foods in your life, like cake. Her are some other foods to avoid.

• sugar
• honey
• maple syrup
• agave nectar
• high fructose corn syrup (you really shouldn’t be eating that anyway)
• dried fruits
• super sweet fruits (bananas, oranges…)

Simple Starches

Simple starches turn right to sugar once they hit your system. That’s not good. You don’t want to give those yeasties more of what they want. Avoid white rice, pasta, white bread and other pasteries.

Yeast

The last thing you want to do is invite any more yeast to this party. That’s why foods that contain yeast are not a good idea. So no store bought fermented foods. I really wish I knew how to make soy sauce at home. Here’s a list:

• soy sauce
• vinegar
• most condiments
• pickles
• sauerkraut
• olives
• bread (again)
• alcohol

Now that you’ve cut all the joy and pleasure out of life the Candida party will die down a bit. Once the party winds down and they start to tire out it’s time to hit them were it hurts.

Bring in the Anti-Fungals

Now that they’re weak it’s time to hit them with some anti-fungals. You can get your doctor to prescribe you an anti-fungal medication, but if your cheap like me you might want to go for an all natural one. Here are a few:

• grapefruit seed extract
• oil of oregano
• coconut oil
• garlic
• clove oil
• olive leaf extract
• aloe vera

We’re using grapefruit seed extract along with a bit of coconut oil. We use coconut oil all the time anyway.

Probiotics

Once you’ve killed off the yeast you need to repopulate the space with some healthy bacteria. Take a good quality probiotic supplement. If you leave that space unpopulate Candida riffraff might move right back in. Getting good bacteria in there as soon as possible is necessary to make sure your Candida problem doesn’t return.

We’re in week two of our Candida diet and I can say that even though I hate having a restricted diet it’s going okay. I mean I’m not alive and well enough to write this post.

I used to think Candida sounded kind of pretty. It could be my first child’s name…Candida Marie Bettison. I’ve changed my mind now. Our first child will definitely be named Lactobacillus Bettison instead.

I’ve had a backache for the past week. It started on Saturday. Being the worrier that I am, by the time Thursday rolled around I’d convinced myself that I had a tumor and would be dead by Monday. I spent Thursday night planning my funeral and writing my eulogy. I think I’m a pretty good writer and could come up with a eulogy that would have even the most stoic person sobbing and falling out in the isle of the funeral home be-wroth with grief.

In the mist of this pity party my husband had a great idea. “If it hurts so bad, why don’t you go to the doctor?”

I’m so used to not being able to go to the doctor that I’d forgotten I could now. So I got up bright and early the next morning and made a doctor’s appointment.

The doctor was a nice stout man with a small voice. After having me do some stretches to rule out muscle strain and testing my pee to make sure it wasn’t a kidney infection, he palpated my abdomen and said, “It seems like you constipated.” He told me to get some laxatives and sent me on my way.

I couldn’t believe it. What? Constipated. You’ve got to be kidding me! I thought. No tumor. No exploding ovary. This is what I get from the NHS. Constipated! I was outraged.

After much ranting and complaining about the doctor obviously not knowing what he was talking about, I drank some prune juice and let’s just say that my back pain has gone away.

Last week I wasn’t feeling well, so my husband went running in the morning without me. When he got home he said he ran so fast that he had to run further than we usually do to make the run last the full twenty minutes. He was so happy to tell me that.

Today just when I was about to give up—running is still very hard for me—I took off like a cheetah and ran very fast for five full minutes. “This is the normal speed I run,” he said, running after me. “You better slow down before you overdo it.”

I kept on running, leaping over puddles like a gazelle. I can run too. I can run fast. I didn’t pass out until we got home.