Stop Making Videos?

Someone I live with who I will not name put on his meany bikini when he woke up this morning and suddenly had opinions to share about my videos. Despite all that, I have a new video for you today. Enjoy!

Cotton Candy Canyon

Remember when I said I’d start making videos again eventually? Well, eventually is finally here. I never said the videos would make any sense. I just promised videos.

It looks like I have a mustache in this, but I swear I don’t. It was just the lighting. If I did have a mustache though it would definitely be an ironic mustache. I think I’ll throw the word “mustache” in this tiny paragraph again just for good measure.

Anyway, watch the video and ignore the mustache.

Walking the Cat

So you all know about my latest obsession with dogs which is much different than my obsession with foxes because I could actually get a pet dog one day. I guess I could get a pet fox too, but that’s not as easy as just popping by the pound and picking one up.

I keep trying to imagine my pet dog and what she might be like. I scroll through the SPCA website and pick out contenders. I think I’ll name my dog Lettuce. I’ve decided that’s a good doggy name. I’m also going to get a cat and name him Bacon. Every time I tell my husband that I plan on teaching Bacon to walk on a leash he looks at me like I’m crazy.

“You take dogs for walks, why can’t you take a cat?” I say.

“You just don’t,” he says.

My husband obviously has no vision. He has no idea that I’m going to start a world wide cat and dog walking trend. I imagine myself walking Bacon and Lettuce together on a leashes through my new sidewalk filled neighborhood. It will be great. We’ll get so much exercise and I’ll be totally in control. People will point and say look at that lady walking a cat and a dog on leashes. I’ll wave and smile with pride.

Everyone will think, “Gee that lady has a good idea.” Before you know it in every country in the land people will start waking their cats and dogs together. Inspired by the new found harmony between cat and dog all people will stop fighting and peace will spread across the Earth. All of this walking will cure the obesity epidemic and people will be healthier.

The world will be a much better place just because I taught my cat to walk on a leash with a dog. Once they get the walking down I’m going to teach my dog to drive a car and my cat to read a map.

Now I just need to get the cat and dog.

Hell Drivers

We watched a really good movie the other day. It’s about driving dump trucks really, really fast and features lots of sped of footage of dump trucks going really, really fast. If you haven’t seen Hell Drivers yet, you’re definitely missing out.

Stop Badgering Me

The other day we went for a walk and we saw a dead badger on the side of the road. I’m talking about the European badger here not the honey badger. (Note: The honey badger isn’t really a badger. It’s a weasel. No wonder.) European badgers are big. An adult badger can get to be 50 pounds. I wouldn’t want to run into one of those in a dark alley.

Apparently there are a lot of badgers around here. How come I never see them though? I see tons of foxes and even see strange fat little deer but no badgers.

Anyway…the point of this post is that I searched for badgers on YouTube and found this video the someone filmed of badgers in their yard. It’s longer than it should be and has no sound, but I was shocked by the how many badgers there were.

According to Wikipedia “[The badger] is very fussy over the cleanliness of its burrow, and defecates in latrines.” That is too funny. Now I’m afraid I’ll open my bathroom door one day and find a badger sitting on the toilet saying, “Do you mind!” They are also social animals who have been known to bury their dead and they don’t mind sharing their burrows with rabbits and foxes.

No Video Today…

Sorry guys, but there is no video today. My husband is very enthusiastic about packing and most of our home is in boxes. He has arranged most of them in the bedroom because he’s trying to figure out how to pack them into the storage unit. So really I guess I’m the only one with the organizational skills of a tadpole in this house. Don’t worry I won’t show you the toad video ago.

I have something even better than a toad video this time. Here are some great tips about how to slow grind the next time you’re in a dance club. Nothing nasty here. These time are for respectful slow grinding.