A New Job

I’ve been trying to come up with a good way to earn a little extra money. It would have to be something that challenged me both mentally and physically. It would also have to pay at least $94.13 an hour. Anything less than that isn’t really worth my time.

That’s why I decided to try out to be a cheerleader for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. First of all it requires tons of memorization. You have to learn cheers and dance steps. Have you seen me dance yet? Oh yeah you have …

My memorization skills are spectacular. That’s why it took me almost a year to memorize my cell phone number.

The job would also require some acting because I’d have to pretend I was interested in football. Anyone who’s seen my You Tube channel knows that my acting skill are second to none. Every year that I’m not nominated for an Oscar I’m shocked. What in the world is wrong with the members of the Academy?

I have all the skills necessary to be a cheerleader. I was going to call the folks at One Buccaneer Place to let them know that I’m available to lead some cheers next season when I found out how little cheerleaders get paid. That’s nowhere near the $94.13 an hour I require. It looks like it’s back to the drawing board.

I wonder how much pilots make. They are responsible for many lives so it must be tons, right? I’m sure I could fly a plane. I mean how hard could it be?