Speed Reading Fail

Yesterday I decided to teach myself to speed read. Not because I’m a slow reader, but because I just thought it might be a good skill to have. How impressive would it be if I could read an entire book in a day! Hi, my name is Lovelyn and I read all of War and Peace yesterday. Come on, I know that statement impressed you.

The first step to learning how to speed read is grabbing a random book from the shelf and trying to read it really really fast. Once I realized that wasn’t working out very well, I decided to search for instructions online. I found these from Tim Ferris, of course.

Why do speed reading instructions have to be so long and complicated? Good grief, you already have to know how to speed read just to get through the speed reading instructions. I had allotted 25 minutes out of my busy work day of checking Facebook and updating my Twitter account to teach myself how to speed read, but the instructions seemed like they’d take 20 of those minutes to read. Still I pressed ahead … until I got to the part that involved math.

What the heck does multiplication have to do with reading all of Moby Dick in one day? Nothing that’s what. With that my dreams of speed reading were dashed. The allotted time was up and I had to get back to doing more important things, like watching this …